Man Morning blends motivation, humor, and honesty for men who are building better lives in real time.
I found my dad at 4 AM.
He was sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee.
Lights off. Silent.
Alone in the dark.
He wasn’t reading. Wasn’t listening to anything. Just sitting there.
How could he just sit there and do nothing?
Now I get it.
My dad passed a few years ago.
But that image of him at the table never left me.
Since losing our home in the California wildfires earlier this year, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve found myself doing the same thing.
Sitting in silence. Early morning. Late at night. Just there.
What's wild is how the world keeps moving after tragedy.
The bills. The people. The pressure. None of it stops.
Society moves on fast. Friends stop checking in. But you’re still here, carrying it.
This year has been hard.
I don't talk about it much. I see a therapist now and then. I lift heavy weights.
I keep moving forward.
And, I'm acknowledging it now:
It's been hard.
I’ve masked a lot of the pain with my work, travel, food, a drink. Whatever would help me not feel it for a bit.
This is what I call emotional constipation.
If you don’t get it out, it builds up.
And eventually, you overflow or explode when you least want to.
It’s not just sadness or grief.
It’s also joy, anger, fear.
Everything we hold in because we think we’re supposed to handle it.
It would be easier not to write this.
To keep it moving. Stay productive. Pretend everything’s good to go.
But someone reading this is carrying something heavy too.
And I want you to know what I keep reminding myself:
We’re not built to do this alone.
It's okay to ask for help.
The truth is no one’s going to feel sorry for you.
No one’s going to give you a medal for doing what you’re supposed to do.
And they shouldn’t.
But that’s the hard truth:
No one owes us anything.
But we owe ourselves everything.
People care about us.
But no one can care more about our lives than we do.
I think about my father at that table a lot.
Who he was. Who I am now.
And what he might say if he saw me doing the same thing.
I’m optimistic about the future.
And optimism and pain can coexist.
Both can be true.
Antonio
P.S. Felt this? Buy me a coffee.
P.P.S. If you're going through something right now and this landed, hit reply and let me know. You don't have to share details. Just know I'm here. I see you.
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