Motivation, humor, and honesty from a man actively dodging a midlife crisis so you can too.
You start growing.
Working out. Eating better. Going after bigger things at work.
Then some people who’ve known you the longest start pushing back.
“You’ve changed.”
“I remember when you used to…”
“You never would’ve done that before.”
It’s chill at first.
You lose a little weight and suddenly friends show up with dessert.
Or drinks.
Or the fast food you’re trying to avoid.
You start showing up bigger at work and someone says,
“Relax, man. You’re making the rest of us look bad.”
I used to think this meant I was doing something wrong.
Too focused. Too intense. Too much.
Here’s what it really means:
Your growth threatens people.
Not because you’re doing anything to them.
Because your progress holds up a mirror to what they’re not doing in their own lives.
And that makes them uncomfortable.
People who aren’t growing will try to pull you back.
Not always on purpose.
Not always with bad intent.
But they will.
They’ll say things like, “I just want what’s best for you.”
Which often means is:
“I want you to stay exactly where you are so I don’t have to face where I’m not.”
Crabs in a bucket.
The next time someone “checks in” like that, ask yourself:
Do they want what’s best for me?
Or what keeps things easy for them?
The right people aren’t threatened by your growth.
They’ll be lifted and encouraged by it.
They’ll celebrate your wins.
They don’t need you to stay small so they can feel big.
Antonio
PS: Dig more into this topic in my bestselling book, Stop Living on Autopilot.
PPS: Ready to turn things around? Grab The 1-Day Method Starter Kit for free.
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